Thursday, February 3, 2011

I no longer want to be attached.

Feelings suck.

Love, hate, like, happiness, sadness, anger, excitement, embarassment.
I've decided I don't want any part of them any more.

I want to hover over everyone, unattached.
I want to not care when something doesn't happen how I expect it to.
I want to not have expectations.
I want to be apathetic, indifferent.

I want to be a liminal being.
(lim·i·nal: adj \ˈli-mə-nəl\
barely perceptible)

I want to float above the petty feelings that people suffer through every day.
I need to stop living for food.
I want to barely exist.

Because, you see, as much as I want to not exist, I'm so afraid of nonexistence that I couldn't possible go to that level.

So I'll exist liminally.

I'm not sure if you can turn liminal into an adjective. I just did, so suck it grammar snobs.
I am one...
A grammar snob, I mean.

When my mind and body operate on the same plane, I will be happy.

1 comment:

  1. liminal is an adjective...u turned it into a adverb heheheehe. Not that it really matters. What matters is that you can't really escape your feelings and remain human. By wanting to not have feelings, you show that you have feelings. It's impossibly frustrating, I know. I went through this. Get some help if you can. I hope you will be alright. There is happiness in life you just have to force it to come out of hiding. You're strong, you can do it :)