Friday, April 22, 2011

I think I'm going insane.

My mental thought process is very quickly degrading.

I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. I'm not going to edit this post at all so you all can see-the entire internet can see what the fuck is going on inside my head. I swear this is complete what's-it-called shit I don't remember what it's called- STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS.

This is what's going on in my head and dear sweet Jesus, I think I'm finally breaking.
I don't even know what the fuck is wrong with me and I feel like and idiot and K probably thinks I'm an idiot for texting him so much and he probably just laughs at everything I fucking say because that's how ridiculous I am and oh my God I swear I'm fucking psycho.
This doesn't make any sense, I know and it probably seems like this is completely fucking fake but SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME all my thoughts are going too fast and I have a headache... Maybe I'm just pretending to be going crazy- but that's crazy, pretending to be going insane. I've been eating way too much lately, maybe that's it. I'm getting sick, my throat is sore, I only have three more weeks of hell/school left and I can't wait to graduate and I can't wait for fucking college. I don't know how I'm going to handle camp this year I've been such a fucking little kid talking to him he probably thinksKNOWS I'm ridiculous, Jesus I almost spelled "ridiculous" with a fucking "E", like "rediculous"... So much for spelling bee champ.

1 comment:

  1. <3 everything will be ok, and you're not going insane, and he doesn't think you're a little kid. oh yeah, and I LOVE YOU and YOU ARE AMAZING <333 *hugs*
    maybe you just need some motivation? and a breath of fresh air. try to stay calm, i know it's hard when you can't stop your brain from going 200 miles an hour, maybe do some yoga?
    i'm always here for you <333