Thursday, September 16, 2010

Because of my schedule right now, I. Can't. Starve.

And it's pissing me off.
Because I have to give blood in two weeks, because I can't get dizzy at cheerleading, because I just don't know.

So, my goal to get through the next through weeks sane and NOT FATTER is to eliminate bingeing. And worry about the starving secondarily.

I said last night I didn't have stories.
And when I posted, I didn't.
Then out of fucking nowhere, a guy that I've known all my life, that I was completely in love with for most of my life, texted me after not talking to me. At 1:30 in the fucking morning.
We talked until almost 4:00 a.m., then we were talking tonight.

I'm pretty sure he just fucking annoys me now.

Isn't that funny? This guy, who I've been wishing for so long would talk to me finally starts. But the guy I really want to talk to I'm pretty sure thinks I'm just a fucking annoying little kid.

I love all your comments. :] Thank you so much. They put a smile on my face when everything else is a mess. <3


  1. That's cuz we're trying to make it not a mess anymore! =]

    I hate that feeling... It's happened to me too many times to count... I think that the times that I've been rejected actually outnumber the times I've been accepted..

    so yeah, I know how you feel, love

  2. Hold on, babe.
    I'm glad you think he's a douche. Closure, perhaps?

  3. Stay strong sweetheart! <3

  4. Dear Charlie,
    I think you are doing the right thing by eliminating binges for now. I know it can be so overwhelming to restrict at times when your schedule is so busy and you physically need energy throughout the day. Right now I'm in a bingey phase and trying to restrict just made it worse (but I'm hoping its all out of my system finally). Anyway, its one of those things where you have to do what you can now. Work on getting control of the binges first, then restrict when it works for you. Making small changes and efforts each day will add up to a big difference <3