Wednesday, June 2, 2010

I couldn't think of a decent title.

So fuck that.

I had things to say. And here they are, as I remember them.

Woke up at 155.8 today. Going to go to bed at 155.6 (woo?).
If I'm not 154 tomorrow, I might scream.

So 154 for Thursday, that leaves 153 (!!!) for Friday, and 152 for Saturday, if things continue to go according to plan. If things keep going as well as they are, I won't be 145 by June 20th.
I'd be 136. Which is, in fact, considerably better.
But, being the failure-whore that I am, I think I'm going to make my new goal 140 by June 20th, which gives me four "cheat" days (I hate the word cheat, it makes things sound so cheap), to not lose anything (OR GAIN ANYTHING, YOU FAT WHORE).

Needless to say, I don't plan on using those days.

For you Muggles who asked. :]
That's a great guide for playing Quidditch as a Muggle to avoid any excessive attention. :] Feel free to start your own Quidditch teams. :]

Self-worth is going downhill again.
Went for my run today after my mom came home. Came back tired, out of breath, cramping, slightly dizzy and disoriented. Not a good day for running- overcast and HOT.
"Well, that was fast!"
Yeah, thanks, Mom. Just fucking tell me I was out for a long time as opposed to fifteen minutes and we'll all get along easier. Had a mini-croissant (yeah, I know, no need to tell me) and a banana when I got home. I think I'll have those for breakfast tomorrow. The banana is for the potassium- I'm desperate to get rid of the cramp, even if it takes high-calorie fruit. I've been running through it, but it's beginning to feel like one of those chronic illnesses that people get used to. I don't like getting used to pain.

I got a nasty comment today from a nasty girl. I was getting a ride home with two of my friends who go to this exercise program. It's basically like a gym for teenagers, to help them tone up or get in shape for sports seasons. I guess it's for adults too, but I mostly hear about people my age going.
So this nasty girl, who is extremely judgmental of other people (more so than me- She called one of my oldest friends a slut for no reason. The girl has never even had a boyfriend!), she sidles up to the car window as we're getting ready to hit the pavement and looks in.
"Where are you guys going?"
I gave up shotgun for the friend who would be going to the gym, so I'm sitting in the backseat. They respond with the name of the place, and I say that one is driving me home.
And she says in this snotty voice, "Well, of course CHARLIE'S not going," and walks away.

Not everyone is born naturally skinny. Fuck you bitch. No one likes you, they think you're creepy with all those weird little voices you do.

Sorry, venting.

Scarlet; I'll get around to posting my self-portrait, I promise! I'm not sure where my camera is at the moment. Which normally would be a lie, since I always know, but this time, I honestly have no idea. :]

Katie (skinnybusiness); Yeah, I was kind of surprised with myself as well- but then, he's the one who said that if I started exercising I would be 105! If I said anything higher, he'd probably go on about "optimal weight", etc. So I figure with him, it's better to aim lower. Or higher. If that makes any sense. XD At least he doesn't know I'd really like to be 98 pounds.

I love you all. Thank you for being jealous of my mad broomstick skillz. Skillz with a "Z", 'cause I'm cool (not) like that. <3 Stay wonderful.


  1. I hope your plan goes well! And don't even think about that girl she's nothing in your world. Just some haters; ignore them.
    Hey; and e-mail me sometime? alright?
    stay strong

  2. crazy stupid bitch, yeah noone like u snotty little skank. i swear, i feel like im actually there giving it to this little whore
    i hate ppl like that. just cuz shes so insecure doesnt mean she has to get hate on other ppl D<
    cheers to the great pace you're at!! you'll be 130 in no time. lov u :)

  3. ★★ What a horrid horrid girl she was. I would have been struggling with not pushing her out of the car (stupid morals, stupid laws). It will be a slap in her witchy hag face when you become perfection personified and she remains a butt-faced miscreant.

    I love your blog. ★★