Wednesday, May 12, 2010


Since I'm still not completely emotionally stable, I've continued the liquid fast, but modified.

See, I ate dinner tonight. Dinner being crackers, cheese, a banana, some croutons, and a box of Red-Only Starbursts, around three-thirty/four p.m.

And three donut holes and a mini-cookie during the AP Exam... But I was about to fall asleep and-
No, Charlie, no excuses. Do not give the only people in the world you truly trust excuses for your own inadequacy.

So yes. I ate.
I'll try to do better tomorrow. No promises.
Down a pound this morning from yesterday.

I think the orange juice I've been drinking upsets my stomach. Every day I drink it, I've been getting these intense intestinal cramps.
And gas, too.

Too much information?
Well, suck it Trebek.

Yeah, we watched Will Ferrell SNL today in AP English instead of doing anything, as a celebration for finishing the test.
I got a book today called "Models Don't Eat Chocolate Cookies". I don't think it's ED related, but I like the title. I got a lot of books today.
But that's beside the point.

I'm feeling better today.
I made an effort- maybe that makes the difference?
I felt connected. Connected.
Instead of disassociated. Things clicked.
I even teased one of the more popular guys in my grade after school (ahahaha, how corny. "Popular guy in my grade." Ahahaha). I don't know where the balls came from.

Maybe I'll finally get my Adam's Apple and penis, too.

That was a joke.

I love you guys. Thank you for your beautiful comments.

Stay as wonderful as I know you are. :]


  1. You just gotta do the best you can, and you're doing it!

    I want croutons now:(

  2. Hey, I took AP English too! Although, I finished it last semester. Maybe it's different in Canada? I wrote my exam last week. :)

    Gracefully, we weren't allowed any food or drink in the exam room. I would have nervously eaten my way through anything.

  3. Charlie,
    Good luck with your exams! It's great to read that you're feeling more connected :)

  4. which AP exam did you take? I took 3 last year ((AP Bio, AP Lit, and APUSH)) and tomorrow is AP Human Geo

  5. YOU stay wonderful! We love you! I'm super glad you are feeling connected :) Just do as much as you can... be realistic. Sometimes I set myself free to do much better when I take things slow and I'm patient with myself. As long as you are still losing, that's what matters. Love you!!!

  6. Good congratulations on the 1 pound loss.
    and that book sound interesting.
    when you have read it please let us know if it was good or not.